Our natural tendency is to resist painful thoughts or feelings. This means we suffer two pains-the painful heart-wrecking situations themselves and our resistance to it! For example, I felt stressed because of the condition I was in and second of all, I couldn’t describe how I felt to other people again and again. Then I thought, I hate feeling so stressed.
The primary pain is stress about the situation I am in, and the secondary pain is feeling, “I wish I weren’t so stressed. “The solution is acceptance. Let the unpleasant situation be as it is, without trying to change it or push it away.
By fighting the pain, we feel we intensify our suffering. However, if we accept our feelings, we don’t heap an extra layer of pain upon the one we are already feeling. It is normal to feel sad. It’s okay that I feel this way. Acceptance doesn’t mean you like what is happening; it just means you accept that certain things are beyond your control.No matter what the situation. Resisting the situation and feelings only magnify the pain.