Month: September 2020

“PRETTY EASY…“

Not gonna lie, this action was pretty easy. When Garima told me her plans for the food, she surprised me with khichdi. I already make this at least once a week. I prepared to get a complicated dish but it ended up being pretty easy. I may have ended giving Garima a complicated dish. Even my parents told me why I would do that to her. I felt pretty guilty about that. But she did say that even though it was pretty elaborate, it was fun. Phew!

Garima gave a little workbook to note down my thoughts and emotions through each step which I thought was lovely. Making khichdi is a fairly mechanical process. At first, I followed Garima’s instructions but I ended up doing it my way haha. In the khichdi workbook, Garima suggested that I make a pillow fort and have a 70s/80s bollywood movie night while eating khichdi. Khichdi is about comfort and setting should be reflective of that comfort.

I was really, really, really excited to make the pillow fort. I have never done this before but thankfully Garima sent instructions. I ended up improvising because I don’t have two chairs. It took some time to figure out but I got it done 🙂 Then it was movie night. I had my fort, my movie, my khichdi. What more could a person want. At first, it was really fun because pillow fort but then I was feeling a bit uncomfortable probably because i didn’t have enough pillows to really call it a fort. I moved to the bed and enjoyed the rest of the movie night with my blanket.

Throughout this whole action, I only had feelings of nostalgia. I was intimately familiar with these ingredients. I grew up with these ingredients and still use them to this day. I ended up making the khichdi a lot more slowly because I wanted to process everything; the sounds, smells, colors. Then that 70s/80s bollywood movie night really hit that nostalgia home. Chupke Chupke was movie I watched when I was child. I don’t remember most it but it was so so so nice to revisit. I truly felt comforted 🙂 Thanks Garima!

I met with Kimia 3 times this week. We had our first zoom call after class, pretty late into the night. We talked about the history of our life. I had moved around a lot throughout the years, from Indonesia to Trinidad to Saudi Arabia and now in Mumbai. Meanwhile, Kimia had lived in the same neighbourhood her whole life.

I learnt a lot about myself through Kimia because she was my direct contrast. When we were showing each other our rooms, hers felt very lived in, like that room belonged to her. In contrast, I live in a rented room where I have suitcases strewn about my room. I realized that most the things in my room don’t even belong to me. I have lived in this room for about three years now and I have not made any effort to make it feel lived in. I realized that everywhere I lived, I have always understood that it was temporary.

We met for the second time that week. We wanted to show each other our neighbourhoods. I was walking through the streets, showing her spots that were particularly interesting to me while she was hanging out at the cafe. I took her to all the secret routes I use, the ocean promenade, and my buillding. The ocean promenade is my favorite place in my neighbourhood. I used to go there almost every other day before the plague just to ground myself.

Then she showed me around her neighbourhood. I thought it was funny how different the weather was in each place. It was gray and rainy on my end but it was bright and sunny in Tehran. It just reminded me of the contrast between Kimia and I. The reception was pretty bad on both our ends so there was more talking and less showing. I can’t really say that I learnt much about myself in this process. When I went back home, I thought about this question of what is homeground? I kept thinking and thinking and thinking. I was going around in circles with my thoughts to the point it really frustrated me so I concluded that it was just complicated.

For our third meeting, we showed each other our childhood pictures. I really liked this part. I had to ask my parents for a lot of these pictures so we had to sit down through zoom and go through the memories together. I had a great time showing all these memories to Kimia and listening to hers. I didn’t have any realizations during my show and tell. I was just enjoying myself. When I was lying in my bed later that night, I still couldn’t answer the question of homeground. It wasn’t until I was making the presentation that I noticed a pattern. My homeground was never a place, it was the people. In all the places that I haved lived, my friends and family were my constant, especially my family. I wouldn’t have formed any connection to all these places if it weren’t for the people I met on the way.

The answer to the question, “what is homeground?” is still complicated. It’s likely a question I might never find an answer to but it’s comforting to know that my close ones will be there throughout the journey.